A Minor Rant

When did foul, offensive language become not just acceptable, but laudable? I'm not just talking about swearing, I'm referring also to just plain ugliness. I was in the grocery store last evening and as I was browsing the produce, a woman and a young man (maybe her son?) of about 16 or so were likewise shopping for veggies. I had the pleasure of listening to this kid "jokingly" berate his mother (?) saying things like "dumb-a**" and calling her fat (her whole body was as big as one of my thighs). And she is just laughing, half-heartedly telling him to cut it out. Then she pulls out her cell phone to call someone about their stock of potatoes at home and says something about how she shouldn't have brought Vincent because he's just abusing her, and laughs.

I agree, not only should he have been left home, but she should have asked him to go sit outside in 15 degrees until she was done, unless he chose to knock it off (if you act like a child, expect to be treated like one). Seriously, I avoid taking my kids to the store because of their occasional behavior issues, but they got nothing on this kid and would have been taken outside in a cool minute.

Then he started saying something about killing and maiming her in horrible ways while they both laughed. I nearly said something, maybe I should have, but the best I could muster was a dirty look and a move to another part of the store. I think he just laughed at me and made a joke as I walked away. I did consider reporting them to management, but frankly, I just wanted to get out as quickly as possible. Perhaps my ignoring it is as much to blame as his mother's tolerance. Later as I doubled back to grab something I forgot, from the next aisle over I heard the kid drop a couple of f-bombs. I again considered saying something to the store personnel as I headed for check out. But, the two kids running the register looked younger than this kid, and I then noticed Mr. potty-mouth heading out of the store on his phone saying something about he should have remembered to take his meds. Ya think?

I remember when I was engaged and noticed that it was common practice amongst my in-laws to "tease" each other in really cruel ways. To this day, I regret not saying something the day I heard someone "jokingly" call his daughter "thunder-thighs". Really, don't we have enough constant barrage of negativity to face without expecting it from those who claim to love us the most? But that is another post entirely.

I'm not a prude--I experimented a bit in my youth with offensive language, and I have to admit that there are some times I've heard a bit of foul language used in a very effective way. And, occasionally in moments of stress, I have been known to slip a colorful word in. But generally, it just makes people (me included) sound uneducated and makes those around us uncomfortable. Maybe that's the point.

As my children discover language, we've had this conversation quite a bit. "Mom, is XXXX a bad word?" "Well, not technically, but it certainly isn't a very polite word, so we should try not to use it."

I heard someone describe foul (and I'll include rude and crude) speech as useless, unnecessary words. Really, cut to the chase. Let's quit wasting our time on the pointless and rude and strive for the purposeful and eloquent.

Seriously, who am I to talk about unnecessary words after the birth epics I just posted . . . sheesh!