This morning my son was playing "church". This involved setting up all my kitchen chairs in the living room, standing on the hearth to sing and pray and bless trays of bread and water to be passed amongst the parishioners. It was all very cute until things got ugly. The services had to be halted while I cleaned up the can of peaches Elliot dumped on my bedroom floor, and again while I called poison control after I found him licking a stamp pad.
After it was determined that no hospital trip was required, things again got underway. This was short-lived however. Elliot began double-dipping into the pretend sacramental bread which infuriated the priest/deacon. I had to pause prior to partaking of the water to prevent a brawl. This resulted in the priest/deacon smacking me upside the head and being sent to his room with a spanking.
Considering it was church, there was an awful lot of physical abuse going on.
6 comments:
I can't help but laugh at your pain! Parenting is fun, isn't it?
I feel beat up by the end of church as I do my own version of Mommy Aerobics keeping Brian in the pew. It was great to get caught up on your life and I love the way your tell the story!
Yes, I think this describes about every Sacrament Meeting I attend with children. I've decided I should go share my testimony often since that gives me an excuse to leave the kids for a few minutes during the chaos ... :)
Brenda, weren't you the one who told me it's time for another? . . .
Rachael, aerobics huh? Do I get exercise points for all the times I've hauled Ethan out into an empty classroom, pinned him to a chair (thanks to the safe-restraint tips from my special-ed teacher friend), and had "reverence practice" time?
Denise, you get to go up there alone? I actually went up last week for the first time in, well years, and of course toted the two-year-old with me who spent the whole time grabbing the microphone. I was very surprised Ethan didn't run screaming up behind me. I've been known to leave my children home with their father when I have to speak, play, or lead the Primary program (no, they were not allowed to participate in the program due to behavioral issues, both past and anticipated--does that make me both a terrible parent and primary leader?)
Yes, but only because I know you can handle it. Hey, I'm the one who hung up the ovaries after two! :)
Jen, once again I find myself wishing we were not so very far away, you see, after your meeting was over, the boys could have come to my girls "primary" where sharing time consists of fighting over the pretend songbook until one child falls off the dining chair they were using as a pulpit and acquires a goose egg on the side of her head. Another argument broke out when 5 year old over critiqued three year old's rendition of "Snowman", telling her that "Now you are a sunbeam you can't sing like a nusery kid anymore" making the little sunbeam break into wracking sobs for an hout because she hadn't realized she couldn't be a sunbeam and go to nursery.
As a mother of three, I can safely say that it is not a choice to be made lightly, as mother's generally have only 2 hands and my brain at least seems to have broken into at least 5 different pieces which only occaisionally seem to communicate with eachother. But you have stage management experience, you are used to dealing with multiple babies at one time!
Love yer blog!!!!
Post a Comment